So I have always tried to be optimistic, and “professional”, for lack of a better term, while writing this. I try to keep my emotions out of it. I try to just tell a story. I figure if I keep the emotion out if it, people will be able to relate to the story, without having to try to read between the lines of emotion. Well, not in this one. It’s 1:21 AM for me. And I’m tired, but unable to sleep again. Stupid insomnia. I thought that being off work, and staying on a normal schedule, (awake in the day, sleeping at night), would make it better. Well, it’s not. And it’s frustrating. And it pisses me off. And then I get worked up cuz I can’t sleep, and well, that makes me stay up longer.
I’m not bothering anyone at this hour, cuz I can’t sleep. So I needed to vent a bit, and here I am. I don’t know what else to say. This is a rather normal part of my life. At least once a week, this is the crap I deal with. And I’m tired. I WANT to sleep. I just can’t. And as my career has gone on, it’s gotten worse. I usually chalked it up to shift work. Messing with my sleep patterns. But I have been on a “normal” sleep schedule for 2 months. And it’s happening more often. Seriously?? WTF??
Well, without going into a full blown rant, complete with way more then necessary F-bombs, I got nothing else to say. Coming on here served 2 purposes. One, was to vent a bit, and hopefully go to sleep. The other, was to express some emotion, and maybe give you a better sense of what I’m feeling. I feel that I have tried my best to keep my emotion out of my blogs, and focus on the story. Well, tonight, (alright, way too early in the f****** morning) my emotion IS the story. This is one of the things I deal with a lot. And while it’s not the worst emotions I feel, it just adds another level of frustration to everything else.
That’s it for now. Gonna try to actually get some sleep. It’s not gonna happen, but sitting here on my iPad sure is not gonna make me sleep.
I’m out. ‘Night